Blog Archives

5 Pointers for The DIY Obsessive in Spain

2/25/2013

Over the last decade or two, Iv'e seen quiet a few expats come and go, and one of the most defined trends has to be that of the DIY Obsessive.

Whilst the housing project is underway there is purpose, activity and a subject for conversation, but once the project has been completed there appears little to fill the gap - other than the unpleasant reality of actually doing something with life. It sort of goes like this...

1. Buy hopeless ruin on dark north facing slope with "possibility of water and electricity." (Preferably unseen by Internet)

2. Spend the next 3 - 5 years battling to legalise the sale and reform the property. During which time a certain amount of Spanish building terms for "cement" will be picked up, thereby convincing yourself that you have all but become fluent.

3. As the conversion from sheep hut to "Villa with pool sleeps 10" goes painstakingly ahead, life purpose is found in weekly trips to AKI or BricoDepot and sadly, dreams of guaranteed "recession-proof" rentals .

4. As the project nears completion (or just as likely never nears completion and is sold on to other unsuspecting newly arrivals), life mission and energy becomes depleted and a loss of purpose erupts as antagonism towards one or all of the following:

Your Spouse
Your Neighbours
Your Local Alcalde
The Junta de Andalucia,
The Seprona patrol who are a tad suspicious that a garage permit tallows the construction of a olympic pool
Or one of the 27 animals that have been "saved from the cruel barbarities of non-expats".

5. Consequently, satellite dishes, cook books, copies of TV Times and deep-frozen packets of crumpets are packed up to be shipped back home.

To this end the Gazpachomonk offes his Marriage saving shortcut to domestic bliss and Iberian Enlightenment in the first of a series of HOW TO GUIDES for the DIY Obsessive.

Todays exclusive teaches how to deal with the eternal problem of Dampness and all things watery that get in the way of a harmonious lifestyle. KNow anyone who's building dream is about to finish? Save a relationship today...post a link to the guide.

Check out How to Deal With Damp Walls in Spanish Houses by Paul Read on Snapguide.

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Satan's Feet and Black Monday

2/19/2013

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Let me listen now....

This weeks episode of Speaking of Spain is now available from the iTunes store or from this web site here.

1: On the show this week is a review of Abby Text Grabber, the image to text recognition tool as well as translator. Find out why it is a mighty fine app to have on your smart phone when out and about.

2: Secondly, there is a short history of the infamous Black Monday incident during the Spanish transition to democracy during the latter half of the 1970's. Find out why the move from authoritarianism to the ballet box was not as smooth as some have made out.
3: Finally, as its cold and grey and rather black out today, I'm reposting an old recipe for garlic soup and tracing back the vegetable's roots all the way to the bottom of Satan's feet.

Speaking of Spain is the fortnightly podcast from the Gazpachomonk. Subscribe free in iTunes or download it here.

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The Path to English

2/11/2013

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We so often think its just us. Struggling to be understood, struggling to understand. But immigration and the problems of communication has been going for quite a while now. And the issues are pretty universal.

The obstacles we encounter here in Spain are not that different from the millions of people that have emigrated over the course of history, and its in our genes, for we were all immigrants in the not too distant past.

" I feel a bit backward..."

So now, we obsess about how we are - or how we are not - engaging with the host culture, and sometimes (well, quite a lot really) get just a tad introspective about the whole issue.

BBC Podcast

There is a podcast from the BBC I listened to last week on language and immigrants and it may be worth a listen to. You may in fact find yourself nodding here and there at a few moments during the program.

So, you may just find this audio file of interest. Its an investigation into how many immigrants into the UK experience cultural and linguistic disadvantages, and proves insightful to anyone who has touched on any of these issues in their daily lives.

"It's like I'm deaf..."

And imagine how they have to cope there with the new laws goverening language requirements to enter the UK. Imagine what would happen here if Spain adopted similar measures!

"Dime dos ejemplos, explicando la diferencia entre por y para...."

Subscribe to the excellent BBC Documentary series, or just download the FREE episode below from this link.

BBC World Service - DocArchive: The Path to English -
Or go to this URL : http://itun.es/i6J26kb #iTunes

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Culture, the Clash and UFO's: Speaking of Spain Episode 2

2/5/2013

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The Second Episode of Speaking In Spain is now available free in the iTunes store, or to download directly from this site here.

This week we interview Sylvie Matter and talk about languages, motivation and living Internationally.

Also we talk about the future of Olive Oil as China muscles in on the market and consider the implications of the new Driving License regulations.

You can find all the podcasts in the Podcast tab at the top of this page or following the link below.

Listen or Download Here

CYD Cama y Desayuno in Loja

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Podcasts, Publishing and Pronunciation: An Interview with the Gazpachomonk

2/4/2013

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Today the Gazpachomonk is interviewed for the online magazine: CheapInMadrid.

You can read the whole interview here. Find out the background to the podcasts on Spain, the books, the moves and the murmurings from the Monk himself.

And speaking of Podcasts, this week marks the release of the second episode of Speaking of Spain. This week an interview with a multinational resident, news and reviews. Check out the iTunes store or drop by the website this week for more information and links.